Anger and how to manage

I am starting a new path for myself, and it is going to be one of less anger.  One area I am and will be learning more about is Tapping.
I would love to hear from others who Tap, and have suggestions and thoughts on this subject.

 

A little bit of my day

Fuck, I said, get off your sister!

WHY are you screaming?!

Stop bugging her!

Don't tease him!

Can't you both stop yelling?  Even for a minute??

Why do keep waking him up?

Do you WANT me to be mad?

Can mommy just take a shower? 

Don't spit that out!

Chew it, no, CHEW it...stop spitting it out!

Let's read a story, can I have the book back?  I thought you wanted a story?  Stop hitting him with the book!

You don't have to yell, I can hear you.

Really, stop yelling.

You are doing that to her to make her mad!

Stop stop STOP!!!!

That is mean!

Don't be mean!

Do you WANT to be mean?!

Time out.

TIME OUT!!!!!

You!!  In your corner!!

7 minutes.

2 minutes.

Fine, 14 minutes.

It will be longer!!!

Stop yelling or it will be 21 minutes!

Why are you laying on the floor?

Stop it.

You are not a snake, get up off the floor.

& etc....

...

Wine, it can be dinner. And a snack. And maybe another snack.

 I ran into the grocery store, grabbed the closest bottle of on-sale wine and a giant package of fresh chocolate chip bakery cookies and plunked them down on the counter, behind a lady who was complaining about the lack of organic food items in the store. 

I felt a pang of guilt.  I quickly pushed it away though, until I glanced up and caught the eye of the woman behind me, she was carrying a canvas shopping bag brimming with fresh produce, what looked to be wedges of herbed goat cheese and fresh crusty bread. 

Hmmm. 

I smiled brightly at her, "excuse me, I will be right back!"  I sprinted across the store and swooped up a couple more items.  Squeezing back into line I thrust 2 more bottles of sale wine on the counter.  No point wasting a good sale, right?  The Produce Lady behind me was shaking her head, no doubt feeling bad for me and thinking sad things, like how I was giant boozy alcoholic.

I wanted to say don't worry, I don't NEED  the booze!  It is medicinal!  I just use it to get through my days! 

Well, OK, so that might not sound as good as when I just thought it in my head.  But still!  I could put the wine back!  I did not HAVE to buy it! 

Ok,  I could put back a couple of bottles anyway.

At last I paid, and clutching my goodies I made my way out and into the parking lot.  Fumbling for my keys and juggling my 3 bottles plus cookies, I accidentally hip checked some unfortunate person as I walked by to my car.  "Hey!"  I heard.  I glanced back over my shoulder, and mumbled a "oh shit"...

Pregnant & Mad, my mini late night drama (mostly in my head)

 A somber, dark sounding voice speaks urgently "who is protecting these babies?  These babies "born at home"".  Voice fades away, replaced quickly by a closeup of a concerned news anchor woman, who is now telling me, us, the viewers that "she will be investigating the lack of LICENSED care for these fragile "babies born at home".

39 weeks pregnant or not, I found myself vaulting upright in bed, staring aghast at the tv while feeling an adrenaline rush not unlike what is experienced after a near car accident.

Speaking as a mama who has 2 lovely home births under her maternity belt, and #3 coming anytime, I am DISGUSTED by such drivel.  I understand that the news is looking for what will drive the ratings up and is backed by whomever is paying for commercials (um, notice how many formula/prescription/vaccine/hospital commercials air around the news???), but STILL. 

I guess in my soft brain I keep thinking that somehow, sometime, THIS TIME, normal birth will be portrayed as...well...normal.

Hahaha.

Ok, maybe not.

I actually found myself furiously scrubbing the living room and kitchen floors, on my hands and knees, muttering crazy disjointed sentences to myself.

When I came up for air, I still felt angry.  Well, full of rage.  Yeah, and say what you want, I am FUCKING sick and tired of being told or having friends told, that home birth is not normal, that it is not safe.  You know what?  If you ask your doctor what the statistics are, most likely he or she will have no idea.  None at all.  Not joking here!  You would think on such a "life and death" issue, they would have SOME sort of information to give you.  I mean, at least so you could spout of numbers to others and guard yourself against the horrors of home birth.

Here is some of the fuel for my still burning fire.

Did you know:

 "A 2009 Canadian study compared safety rates for planned homebirths and planned hospital births attended by the same cohort of midwives.  They also evaluated the safety of planned physician-attended hospital births for a matched population of low-risk women who could have opted for homebirth or hospital birth with the midwives in the first two groups.  Of these three groups, the homebirth group had the best safety statistics and the lowest rates of interventions and serious perineal tearing or hemorrhage; the babies born at home required resuscitation less often than those born in the hospital and were less likely to have meconium aspiration and less likely to require hospitalization.  So outcomes for homebirths were better than for births in the hospital setting with the same midwives or with physicians providing care for a matched population of low-risk mothers."*

How about:

"Professional midwives practicing in all settings work to recognize minor problems and correct them before they become major problems.  In the hours leading up to a birth, if a serious problem develops and a cesarean becomes necessary, there is a safety margin of 30-75 minutes in which to assemble a surgical team. For this reason, many midwives recommend that women labor and birth within 30 minutes of a hospital, to be on the safe side in case a serious emergency does arise; this provides the same safety margin for women birthing at home as in the hospital." *

Or:

A landmark study on homebirth safety  was published in the British Medical Journal in June, 2005.  This study showed that homebirths and hospital births had similar overall safety rates, but that there were fewer interventions and fewer complications for the homebirths.  This was a prospective study with a rigorous research design and the most comprehensive North American study about place of birth.  A suite of homebirth safety studies from the UK in 1996  also showed home to be as safe as or safer than a hospital for low and moderate-risk women.   Homebirth opponents sometimes cite studies that show homebirth to be less safe than hospital birth, but these studies use statistics from births with no midwife in attendance or high-risk births far from hospitals.  In a 1999 review of all the literature on the relative safety of different places, of birth, Zander and Chamberlain wrote, "No evidence exists to support the claim that a hospital is the safest place for women to have normal births." *

That is just a drop in the bucket as far as info out there on the safety of home birth.

I am also confused as to why there are so many people out there who feel it is their job to convince us home birth that we are damn wrong and should be very afraid.  I thought there was still freedom of choice?  Yes?  And I feel very passionately about birth, but I don't feel this pressing desire, NEED, to share it with everyone!  My friends and family have had many different types of birth, and I don't find myself thinking "well sure, you seem ok with it, but it would have been better if you did it my way.  Dur." 

No.

It is a personal choice, it should be respected as such, and anyone trying to force you to believe otherwise should take a giant fucking leap off of the nearest tall building.

I believe that birth is normal, is beautiful, is painful, is challenging, is awe inspiring. 

Do I think that everyone should have have a home birth?

Lord no.

But do I feel an almost delirious amount of anger when someone tells me that the hospital is so much safer.  Yes.  Yes I do.

Let me now share a few fun facts with you.

"In addition to the specific dangers of individual obstetric interventions, hospital births suffer the effects of any form of institutionalized care.  Perhaps the best-known risk of hospital birth is hospital-acquired infections.  Those most susceptible to hospital-acquired infections are those with compromised immune systems, such as newborns.  In particular, babies are born with sterile skin and gut that are supposed to be colonized by direct contact with the mother's skin flora.  If antibiotic-resistant hospital germs colonize the baby's skin and gut instead, the baby is at high risk of becoming very sick from infections that are very difficult to treat.  The overall infection rate for babies born in the hospital is four times that of babies born at home, and these infections are more likely to be antibiotic-resistant." * 

I am going to write this one in REALLY big letters.  Get ready...

"More people die every year from hospital-acquired infections (90,000) than from all accidental deaths (70,000), including motor vehicle crashes, fires, burns, falls, drownings, and poisonings. An additional 98,000 people die each year from general medical error ."*

Yeah, you did just read that right.  I feel safer already snug at home, pushing out my baby, in my own germs, thank you so very much.

Again, this is just the tip of the iceberg as far as information goes. 

See, what I keep telling people is, fine, you want to got the hospital, it feels comfortable, you are used to having a medical provider tell you what to do, you plan on having drugs and what not...that is great!  That is your choice, for your body!  Good job making a choice for you!

Now, here is the kicker.  I also get to make a choice, for my body, for my baby, for our health.  And I choose something much different.  Why is that wrong?  My midwife is licensed, she has medical supplies, she has oxygen, she has attended 100's of births.  She believes in my body, in women's ability to give birth vaginally, to pick positions that will work the baby out when left to ourselves.  That birth can be a quiet, nurturing, loud, loving, non violent place of peace.

So fuck off News, and fuck off with you one sided view of birth.

Now maybe I can go to sleep.

* I took many things from articles written by  Ronnie Falcão, LM MS.

To Groupon or not

 This is very interesting to me!  The blog linked below, made some intriguing comments about Groupons and Living Social-like Coupons.  I have been interested in them personally as well as a possibility for our businesses, but wanted to do some research on them first.  What I am finding is quite eye opening!

Here is a quote from his blog.

"What really got me angry yesterday, however, was an article I read online called “Groupon gripes: Are daily deals headed for disaster?.” In it, the author discusses the problems that Groupon causes for businesses. He admits that many businesses “don’t even break even.” Yet he finishes up the article by encouraging consumers to take advantage of Groupon deals:

Skeptical as I may be, the limited funds in my bank account make me a consumer first and an observer second. As companies line up to split prices in half and make them even easier for consumers to find, I’ll be there right alongside soaking up the deals. I did, after all, milk AllAdvantage for triple digits before the goons running the place depleted their venture capital and shuttered the place for good.

In other words, if this ship’s going down, I’m raiding the buffet before hitting the lifeboats. Join me for an oyster?

Or: Fuck the businesses and the economy that they fuel. Suck up all the cheap deals you can while the businesses stupid enough to offer them are still around.

Not exactly the kind of insightful commentary I expect from a journalist.

And the Winner Is…

As one of my Twitter friends said:

“The only one who wins with Groupon is Groupon itself.”

I couldn’t agree more."

Read more by clicking here > http://www.aneclecticmind.com/2011/03/18/why-groupon-is-bad-for-business-and-consumers/

no naps & other small things

Today was a no nap day.  Which, as I told mom earlier, is like my own small version of hell.  The whining, crying, screaming, wailing, rolling on the floor, hitting, and heat. 

Heat you ask?  Yes.  Because I start to have hot flash after hot flash at this point of my pregnancy when feeling overwhelmed or upset.  So really, mini Melissa hell.

There was one upside however, today anyway, to no nap day.  And that is that Tamra went to sleep early, and Eddie and I had time to cuddle together on the couch and watch Castle.  We don't get very much one on one time right now, and he really was excited for the 2 hours of pure mom time.  :)

Now everyone is asleep.  Thank you God.

I love walking around my little condo, doing the little bit of extra cleaning before relaxing.  I love all the little things that come together to make it so peaceful for me to live here.

That it is small, that there is no carpet, that the wood floors shine whenever the light hits them, that my kids help tidy up easily, that Eddie sits to pee so the bathroom stays clean longer (hahaaahaa, strange happy thing, but it is a biggie!), that all my pictures fit on the walls, that the bedroom is super cozy and is like my sweet sleeping cave, that I can drink my glass of wine & write or read without any interruption...

This is my happy list, and I am trying to always add to it, to remain positive, to remember all that I have that is so wonderful.

Happy Sleeping!

:)

Freak Out

I am having a mild melt down as I stare at the stacks of tubs and boxes lining the wall of the condo.

I was doing so good, taking it all a day at a time, and now, tonight, I feel like I can't quite wrap my mind around everything I need to do.

I need to unpack.  I need to put the beds together.  I need to figure out if I have any baby clothes.  I need to pick out a name for the baby.  I need to get rid of stuff, so I need to figure out what I actually use.  I need to put my feet up so the swelling goes down.  I need to be able to fall asleep so I don't want to bite the heads off the kids in the morning.

I need to calm the fuck down.

Maybe if I unpack 2 boxes a day...hmmm...that would mean I took over 2 weeks to unpack...not bad in the whole big picture.

And it's really ok if I don't have a name until baby is born...right??

Sigh.

Now, If I could go to sleep.

Off to find my Turn-Off-My-Spinning-Mind Herbs.

Freat Out

 I am having a mild melt down as I stare at the stacks of tubs and boxes lining the wall of the condo.

I was doing so good, taking it all a day at a time, and now, tonight, I feel like I can't quite wrap my mind around everything I need to do.

I need to unpack.  I need to put the beds together.  I need to figure out if I have any baby clothes.  I need to pick out a name for the baby.  I need to get rid of stuff, so I need to figure out what I actually use.  I need to put my feet up so the swelling goes down.  I need to be able to fall asleep so I don't want to bite the heads off the kids in the morning.

I need to calm the fuck down.

Maybe if I unpack 2 boxes a day...hmmm...that would mean I took over 2 weeks to unpack...not bad in the whole big picture.

And it's really ok if I don't have a name until baby is born...right??

Sigh.

Now, If I could go to sleep.

Off to find my Turn-Off-My-Spinning-Mind Herbs.

Save the Midwife! Help us correct the growing trend of birth as "big business"- save the only homebirth midwife in our community.

This is a very dear subject for me.  I have donated, and I strongly urge you also to send even a few dollars their way.  Every little bit helps, and shows how we support the small town midwife. http://www.indiegogo.com/Save-the-Midwife

My idea of feminism is self-determination, and it's very open-ended: every woman has the right to become herself, and dowhatever she needs to do.

"I have something to prove, as long as I know there's something that needs improvement, and you know that every time I move, I make a woman's movement." Ani DiFranco I have had these thoughts rattling around in my head for a bit now.  Even as I write this, I am not sure what it is exactly, that I want to say, or how to say it. I do know, that not a day goes by with out me reading or hearing some sort of anti women babble or rant, often from women!  You know, the sort of self righteous crap that we often spit out about each other.  How so-and-so is a bad parent.  How CAN they feed their child that?  Did you hear that she split from you-know-who?  How could she do that?  Don't they know that it is better to just stay together? Did you hear what kind of birth she had?  Does she even know if that was safe? If you sleep with your child you are going to kill them. If you don't sleep with your child you are damaging them for life. She had a miscarriage, it is probably better that way, her life is too crazy anyway. Did you hear that her child STILL does NOT sleep through the night?  This is just a small, mild, sample of what I hear or read, in a few days time. I understand more than ever, how so many women say, that they just never "got along" with other women.  Well of course not!  When you know very well that as soon as you turn your back, it is rammed full of knives from various "friends". "I've been a long time coming, and I'll be a long time gone. You've got your whole life to do something, and that's not very long." Ani DiFranco Women are strong.  We give birth.  We nourish and raise our children.  We make sure meals happen and houses stay moderately clean.  We ensure that there are clean clothes to wear, that our children receive a education.  We cuddle and soothe.  We work full time jobs away from our families and then continue working at home, on the weekends, on holidays and when we are sick.  We rise up when we see wrong and fight for what we see as right.  So much of what we can do is diminished by how much we fight one another.  How we let others put us in a box.  Tell us what we can and can not do.  We are less when we no longer believe in our bodies, or our ability to know, instinctively, what is best for our families. "If you like it, let it be, and if you don't please do the same." Ani DiFranco We give our power away!  We let it slide away, stolen, our gifts, our strengths, belittled until we feel and act as though we know nothing. Our bodies are amazing.  Beautiful.  Sensual.  Strong.  We have the power to grow an entire LIFE inside of us.  We have the power to bring that life into our own hands, to feed and grow it outside of our bodies as we nourished it inside. We have the power, the RIGHT, to choose how WE see fit to raise and protect our young.  To not be pressured or bullied into choosing the "right" way to do things.  There is no right way.  There are MANY ways. I am tired, tired of listening to my sisters talk of how their husband told them to do things that they felt and still feel strongly against.  And they did it.  I am tired of listening to smart women tell me that their doctor told them to give something to their child, something that they felt was not right.  And they did it.  I am tired of hearing from caring warm mothers bullied into believing that how they are raising their families is WRONG.  Often from family members and close friends.  And they believe it. When we choose to go against what we feel at a gut level, what we hear whispered in our hearts, those are the things we will regret until we die.  Those are the memories that will trouble our minds long after our families are grown. Be strong.  Be wise. Listen, to yourself. "It seems that different people have an idea of what I am, and what I should be. And then there's me." Ani DiFranco

Fed up

It is fascinating, how many liars there are.  People who try to make you feel bad, and then come to find out, they should be the ones feeling bad. Reminder to myself...if someone seems to be TRYING to cause "crazy" to be a permanent state of my mind....DROP THEM.  Quickly.  In fact, you really can not get away fast enough. There is not enough time, to spend, to waste, on someone who will never hear what you are saying, no matter how you say it.  When you have had the same conversation, about the exact same thing, more then 10 times, with the outcome turning out the same every time, it is time to walk away. If the unrealistic idea of ME, becomes too heavy of a burden, move on.  I am not perfect, but neither are you. Selfish is never a good place to live, and when you have reached a higher, um, age group, and only have lived in the land of Selfish...well, best realize that that person is most likely never ever going to be able to leave that sweet self centered place.  And yes, it is OK, to not be OK, with that.  Run.  Away. I maintained calmness.  I centered myself.  I embraced change.  I excepted the things that I would not have chosen for myself. And now, I realize, the anger has started to move in.  Maybe I will embrace that, for a time, as well.

"Mom, I am taking a bath in my own sweat"

I find it very interesting that in ALL the reading I did (and if you know me, you know I did a lot) on Puerto Morelos, that not once did I come across any person or website saying that there are often power outages.

Never.

Now I have been here a month, and I enjoyed 4!  FOUR!

I never understood what it would be like to be in a small concrete box, with no fans, no wind, pitch black in 85+ heat. 

As Eddie said, it is like bathing in your sweat.

Mmmm, sweat bath...my favorite.

Did you know if you get hot enough, you will eventually fall asleep out of sheer exhaustion?  Never mind that you can barely stand the feeling of your own skin, your body and mind just at last shut down.

This is a warning to all who want to come to this area, at least in the summer.  Power loss may happen to YOU. 

Oops, Wait...how did we get HERE?

I discovered some new resorts today.  I had no idea that in that direction outside of Puerto Morelos there are fancy giant resorts.

I know this, because, in my hurry to get out of the heat and into a micro bus with the windows wide open...I took the wrong bus.  Yup, we went out of town to drop off employees of the resorts and to pick up the random lost white person wandering in the heat outside of the large resorts.

One of the joys of Puerto Morelos is, that it is very small.  So even spending the extra travel time, it did not add on THAT much time to our trip home. 

Eddie was worried, he noticed right away we had headed in a new direction.  I kept repeating that is was an adventure!  That we could enjoy the new sights!  He stopped worrying out loud, but I believe inside of his sweet head the worry did not stop, as he peered out the open windows at the surrounding mangroves and murky green water. 

"Mom, is that the crocodile's home?  Are we going to see one?"  Not if I can help it baby.

My truly favorite part was when the driver turned around in his seat and fired off some spanish at me, I may not have understood all the words but he was wondering why we had not got off at any of the stops.  And then I got to say in front of the interested crowd that I had in fact boarded the wrong bus.  Haha.  So funny, right?  OK, maybe not funny, but a bit amusing...yes?

Alright.  Not even a bit, his face told me.  Did I in fact know at all the direction I needed to head?  I assured all that I did!  I even knew my street name!  He studied my face for a moment.  Then turned back around and continued to drive, with only the occasional look at me in his mirror.

Just so you know, we did make it home.  And it was an adventure.

Como se dice eso en espanol??

 Right next to the corner market is a tiny little video store.  It is about the size of a very small single garage.  A simple straight line of concrete filled with shelves.

 After our evening shopping and walk Eddie talked me into going in and figuring out how to rent.  We wandered in, the young woman and young man behind the counter smiled and oohed over Tamra.  I walked up to the counter...and...and...my brain went blank.  I could not think how to ask for anything, let alone how to rent.  I could not even remember how to ask for how much the movies cost!  It was like there was just empty space between my ears.

I hopefully tried English.  No go.  They stared at me like I was from another planet.  Shook their heads.  Damn.  Alight.

I will admit right here, that if my children had not been looking at me with big hopeful puppy dog eyes, I would have most likely bailed at this point.  Cut my losses and ran.  Oh ya. 

Finally I groped among my grocery's and dug out the little Mexican Spanish phrase book I was caring around.

I held it up in the air like a lucky talisman, I may even have waved it around a bit.  The store attendants smiled encouragingly, and the other customers stopped to watch.  I could feel my face slowly turning what could only be described as a very deep beet red color.  I felt like I was on fire.  And not in a good way.

At last I managed an ok "Cuanto cuesta esto?".  AHHH!!!  The kids behind the counter smiled!  Si!!  The other customers gave me big smiles and stopped staring as hard at me.  Whew.  The movies they said, cost 10 pesos each.  Awesome, less than a dollar. 

And I also came up with "como?" (how).  I was really rockin' now.  As easy as handing over my drivers license and 10 pesos, and we had rented a movie!!

This has made me want to sit down with my little phrase book and memorize that bad boy.  Good Lord!  And than pray that I don't freeze next time.

However, Eddie is very proud of me.  :)

And I thought I loved to shop...

I like to shop.  Not for stuff around the house so much (though that has it's joys as well), but I LOVE to food shop.

And it is a damn good thing.

I have learned that if I don't want to take a bus to buy grocery's, I can walk 2 blocks to the mini corner store for a random assortment of things.   100% juice, canned goods, diapers, a few items of produce, candy, snacks, water, milk and the best home made "string cheese", you have ever had!  It comes in a big round in a big bag and you tell them how much you want.  Queso is the name, and this has a lovely aged flavor and still does that fun "string thing" for the kids.

Or, I can take a right at the store and walk another block to what I call The Big Red store.  It is a good size, and it is painted red.  There ya have it.

There I can get all grocery items and things like shampoo and toothpaste.  They have great fresh meat, cheese and eggs as well.  However, no produce!  For that I walk another block and hit the produce market...or 2 MORE blocks and I can go to the REALLY good produce market-Chilem.  At the produce markets you can get almost anything your little heart desires including fresh herbs and cactus.  Not many leafy greens though...but fresh eggs and freshly juiced anything they have in stock bottled in a cooler.  I am talking mango, orange, carrot, a mixed green drink, papaya....it is the BEST juice!  

Plain yogurt, whole chickens (yes, head, feet..all of it), raw local honey, plus odds and ends for daily cooking.

To be honest, if I make it as far as the 2nd produce shop, I am waving down the next bus to pass and happily handing over 5 pesos to not have to haul everything back on my own two feet. 

You can tell my kids have been raised in a store, for one, Tamra Rose crawls under all the produce racks and tables and picks up fallen produce and hands to over to the family working.  They have been greatly amused by her.  She however has been greatly disturbed by how much food falls on the ground.

Today on the way to buy produce, we passed a stall open for the evening that has a great selection shoes, and Eddie very badly needed a new pair of sandals.  After much of my spanglish and the shop owners rapid spanish, we settled on a green pair of crocs for 89 pesos-a very good price.  Tamra Rose sat the entire time on the curb in front eating a whole apple and watching with interest as Eddie tried on many shoes.

I know some (ok, most) of the "white" folks here go the extra thirty minutes to cancun to hit up walmart, but I have a very hard time shopping at walmart ever, let alone to completely ignore the local vendors and all that they have to offer.  Which is a lot.  It just takes a little work.

My mission, or one of them, to myself?  Learn ALL the numbers and number combos in Spanish!  Whew, that one hurts my brain.

You have not lived a full life until a monkey has dropped on your head

A couple of days ago I decided that I would take the kids to the Crococun Zoo, (http://www.crococunzoo.com/) since it is only a mile from where we are staying in Puerto Morelos.  It had good reviews online, everyone seemed to really enjoy going.

 

So early in the morning we headed out, grabbed a taxi and rolled on into the zoo.

 

The staff is super friendly, it is not a bad price for a zoo-not a GREAT price but whatever...it was very entertaining.  Eddie and I plus the cost of a bag of food for the animals cost almost 400 pesos.  Tam was free.  I think up to 5 years of age is free which is pretty good.

 

We lined up with a very small group (we got there early!!) and a guide (who took our food and zipped it into his pants pocket...monkey issues he said).

 

We saw snapping turtles, baby crocs and BIG crocs, hairless Mexican dogs, parrots, snakes, deer and lots and lots of monkeys. 

 

In fact, one of the first things to happen to us is that a monkey tried to take tam's sippy cup of water away.  I think i may have squeaked...er...screamed.  I took it back though!  No monkey is getting the best of me!!!!!

 

Eddie held 3 year old crocs, wrapped a small boa around his shoulders, chest...and (ickickick) neck.  I keep telling him how very very brave he is.  They guide tried to get me to hold a snake...I kept backing away, he got closer...I hid behind Eddie.

 

We walked through a pit of very large crocs.  Ok when I say that, you are probably envisioning a US set up with fences and what not.  HA I say!!  NO.  You walk in a gate.  The guide says loudly that you MUST stay in the MIDDLE of the path!!!  Do you hear me?  THE MIDDLE OF THE PATH AT ALL TIMES.  We all huddled together quickly I admit.  Then we walked down a little path through a large-ish area where crocs lay snoozing or just eyeing us.  Guide says "no worries guys!  As long as you don't look like easy food they don't care that we are here!"  Great.  Awesome.  Those words greatly encouraged me.

 

Through this entire fun event we have many a monkey following us and dropping in on us from the trees.  At one point, a larger one misjudged a branch and landed on my head.  It hurt.  I think I may have screamed again.

 

We fed some deer, kids loved that!  That is until a couple of males got feisty over some banana Eddie had and got a little crazy and "hoofed" him as we are calling it.  They reared up and kinda fought with each other.  Unfortunately Ed was standing between them.  Ya.  Only one arm had some broken skin.  Just a little blood guys.  No biggie!  After a quick wipe down with some baby wipes, a spray of colloidal silver and some salve he was good to go and we got down to some serious feeding of the monkeys.  And man, those baby monkeys are freaking so cute!!

 

All in all it was really fun, the guides are super nice and both kids enjoyed feeding and petting everything they could get their hands on.  Really, if Eddie does it, Tamra is damn sure she is gonna do it as well.

 

Even with minor animal drama I would highly suggest you go!

Sweaty from Cancun

Hello!  Er, Hola!!  (I must, MUST learn to speak Spanish for gosh sake!!!)

I am very quickly typing while Tamra takes apart my wallet!!  Must hurry and write FAST.  LOL.

Ok!!!  Easy easy trip here, frontier is awesome for flying with kids.  They have little TVs for EACH seat...and sure you can buy movies BUT the most awesome thing EVER is that they have TV channels!!!  Eddie was in freaking Heaven!!  The
kids
did GREAT not fussing, not crying.  People kept telling me what amazing
travelers
they are.  I said praise the lord.  I mean Goddess (old habits die hard).  LOL.

On the plane from CO to Cancun we had a whole row to ourselves....BLISS. 
and
across the way was another mama traveling alone with her six year old boy
to a
little town outside of Cancun.  we talked the whole trip, exchanged
facebook
info...hahaha...and she said that we MUST meet up or travel together in the
future.  we all went through customs together and picked up all our luggage
together.  It was really nice. 

Side note, not a single person in customs spoke English.  I think it is wonderful.  I did lots of body language and a few Spanish words and WOOT we were through!

This little hotel in Cancun is great, AC, Wifi, pool, beach....however we are the ONLY
whitey
folk here.  Awesome.  And they really don't speak much English.  Oh well! 
we
will learn spanish one way or the other!!!

Every single person who walks by Tamra has to touch her curly blond hair.  And I mean EVERYONE.  Moms, Grandmas, little kids, teen boys, people jogging, people riding bikes...they all pause for a moment to drift a hand over her head as if she is a good luck charm, or more likely, to see what all that fuzzy curly blond hair feels like.  It is pretty awesome.  She just looks at them like, "ya, that is right, worship me". 

HAHA!!!

Tomorrow we leave for P M.

Oh and yesterday by the pool, a little grandma took pity on me and wanted
to
help me...she brought me towels...cause i forgot to ask for beach towels
until
in the water, and she kept wanting to watch tam for me in case i needed a
moment
to swim by myself.

Thanks to my mom, Eddie swims like a fish.  I only really have to watch that Tamra does not throw herself into the water.  Whew.  Thank goodness for that.  ;)

(So i am traveling by myself mom, but only sorta, cause this is mexico and i
have
kids, and EVERYONE wants to help.)  ;)

The air smells like salt, and is wet feeling-like a warm slightly damp
towel. 

Which I am ok with.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
mail2web.com – What can On Demand Business Solutions do for you?
http://link.mail2web.com/Business/SharePoint

Untitled

I have expectations.  Too many.  I realize this about myself.  So every day I tell myself, sometimes out loud, that I need to release those around me to just "be". 

Every single day, I have this talk with myself.  Some days I feel pretty good about it, I can hear what others are saying or watch directions people are taking that I may not want for myself but I am completely content letting it all play out for them.

Other days.  Whew.  I have to almost have a chant ongoing in my head.  Letitgoletitgoletitgoletitgo.  Each person needs to take their own time and their own path.  And just because someone is holding THEIR expectations over MY head is no reason at all to return that kind of vibrations.

Letitgo letitgo.

The days that I feel my shoulders start to tense up, my forehead crinkle as I try to mentally come up with a reason why they should want to attack life the way I do....and I just RELEASE.

Ahhh, it feels so good.

 

 

 

Of Wind & Sea

Just out of sight

Like if I could only turn my head quicker

I would catch a glimpse of the wild sea creatures

Throwing themselves at the rocks

Desperately flinging their bodies

As if the road & my car are their end goal

To surround us with their surging cold wetness

Maybe

They will embrace us

Gently enfolding us

But then

Pull us back with them

To join their dance

The eternal cycle

Of bobbing & blending

In the river

The ocean

But oh

OH when that wind comes

The wind that stirs and swirls

Pounds and pushes

The dance begins once more

And the rocks are holding back

But barely

& they are coming

The chill racing down my spine

Tells me just as sure as my eyes could

MENU!

Download now or preview on posterous

THC Organic Market's Meals to go MENU.docx (10 KB)

THC'S ORGANIC MEALS TO GO MENU FOR THE 21ST!  :)

AND NOW YOU CAN ADD EXTRAS!

:)

Eternal question...why do women live longer than men???

SCROLL  DOWN:: . . . . . . . now stop laughing and make the world have a good day too.

 

See and download the full gallery on posterous

Eternal question...why do women live longer than men???

SCROLL  DOWN:: . . . . . . . now stop laughing and make the world have a good day too.                   This e-mail contains privileged and confidential information intended for the use of the addressees named above. If you are not the intended recipient of this e-mail, you are hereby notified that you must not disseminate, copy or take any action in respect of any information contained in it. If you have received this e-mail in error, please notify the sender immediately by e-mail and immediately destroy this e-mail and its attachments.

 

Confidentiality Notice: This e- mail and all attachments may contain CONFIDENTIAL information and are meant solely for the intended recipient. It may contain controlled, privileged, or proprietary information that is protected under applicable law and shall not be disclosed to any unauthorized third party. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any unauthorized review, action, disclosure, distribution, or reproduction of any information contained in this e- mail and any attachments is strictly PROHIBITED. If you received this e- mail in error, please reply to the sender immediately stating that this transmission was misdirected, and delete or destroy all electronic and paper copies of this e-mail and attachments without disclosing the contents. This e- mail does not grant or assign rights of ownership in the proprietary subject matter herein, nor shall it be construed as a joint venture, partnership, teaming agreement, or any other formal business relationship.

See and download the full gallery on posterous